He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
