To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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