I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Randomize
