I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
