I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Michael Bay diarrhea
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
