My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I am one with the molecules
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
