I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
