We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
