My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just gargled with NyQuil
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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