no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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