and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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