we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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