her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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