so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
