No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Enjoy the penises
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
