Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize