Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Randomize
