K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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