It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
