i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize