I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
