I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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