Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
