I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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