Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
