He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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