Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
