Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
