none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
