Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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