i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I party with great urgency now.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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