either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
