I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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