just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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