Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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