she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Everything about him screamed your future.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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