i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
