We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
