He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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