Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
