Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
