You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize