we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
