I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
