Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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