I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
