i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
