Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I need moral support for this bender
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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