Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Randomize
