Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I want a musical about memes.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
