you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I got inside last night via doggy door
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
